OT: Parent Reaction To a Speeding Ticket

[RAIDEN6]

My question is, if you were a parent and your son/daughter told you they got a speeding ticket, how would you react?

[JerseyDevil]

Depends on how fast they were going and what the speed limit was.

[HollandX]

give him or her death

[Japericho]

Was Nick Hogan driving?

[JerseyDevil]

Well you might as well just tell us what you got busted for.

[biteyahard]

more details would get a better response ;)

[RAIDEN6]

80 in a 65 zone at midnight with no one else on the highway...(besides the cop lol)

[sibelius]

Yank his insurance and driver's license and let him walk for awhile, and he sure as hell would be paying the ticket and any increase in my insurance premium.

[JerseyDevil]

80 in a 65 zone at midnight with no one else on the highway...(besides the cop lol)

Ehhh that's nothing to get upset about. The cop just felt like being an ass to you.

[brewer fan]

As a parent of a 16 year old there could be a lot worse problems than speeding. If that is the worst thing my son does I will be a happy father. Example would be my 17 year old brother who recently got caught for drunk driving.

[ImessedwithTexas]

Threaten to send them to "Uncle" Michael's house.

http://www.glennbeck.com/leadstories/12-10-03/12-10-03.jpg

[KingsFan25]

80 in a 65 zone at midnight with no one else on the highway...(besides the cop lol)

I'd be surprised they pulled them over in California. Thank God then I haven't been pulled over for driving 90 on my way home on an empty highway.

To me in LA that's freeway speed. What Freeway was it?

[zurita54]

As long as you can go to traffic school and it will not affect your parents' insurance I would think it is no biggie.

[Thrall]

NO MORE CAR!
That or what sibelius said.

[bigblu89]

80 in a 65 zone at midnight with no one else on the highway...(besides the cop lol)

It all depends. Do you have your own car/insurance and whatnot, or are you covered under your parents?

[BurningSoul]

I know my mom and dad made me start paying for the insurance after I got my second ticket. And I was ticketed for going a hell of alot slower than that all three times. First one was 64 in a 55, second was 65 in a 55 and the 3rd was 63 in a 55 running late for work. I had a few choice words for that last ahole. If he'd been a little farther down the road he'd have caught me doing atleast 80. Luckily I had just took off from a stop sign.

[icee82]

As a parent of a 25 year old son and an 18 year old son, I have had some experience with tickets and wrecks. It is done. Nothing that you can do will change that fact. Now comes the part of trying to minimize the damage. In some states, he can attend a defensive driving class and there are no license points. Another question...is 15 over on an interstate considered a drivers license revocation offense? In North Carolina...70 on an interstate can result in the loss of your license. My recommendation...get an attorney. It will be worth the $300 that you will have to pay the attorney in the long run.

[sibelius]

I know my mom and dad made me start paying for the insurance after I got my second ticket.

that's the thing. If your parents do nothing after the first ticket, you probably will have a second and a third . . . if you screwed up, you need to pay the costs for that screwup. When it starts coming out of your pocket, that's when you'll learn to follow the laws.

[SlayKnotV1]

If it was my Son/Daughter I'd Take away the car, make them pay for the ticket and probably take there licence away. It don't matter if it's at Midnight or 12 in the afternoon Speeding is Speeding. The Day Thats right the Day my Youngest bro got his licence he borrowed my dads car and got a speeding ticket and got caught on cam running a red light and my dad Flipped.

[RAIDEN6]

I'd be surprised they pulled them over in California. Thank God then I haven't been pulled over for driving 90 on my way home on an empty highway.

To me in LA that's freeway speed. What Freeway was it?126 up in the fillmore area.

It all depends. Do you have your own car/insurance and whatnot, or are you covered under your parents?I have my own insurance plan.

[JerseyDevil]

If it was my Son/Daughter I'd Take away the car, make them pay for the ticket and probably take there licence away. It don't matter if it's at Midnight or 12 in the afternoon Speeding is Speeding. The Day Thats right the Day my Youngest bro got his licence he borrowed my dads car and got a speeding ticket and got caught on cam running a red light and my dad Flipped.

That's why insurance is so high in New York State! We can all thank your brother! :p

[JerseyDevil]

126 up in the fillmore area.

I have my own insurance plan.

Go to court and see if the cop will let you plea bargain down. If it's your first offense maybe he'll give you something like a broken taillight instead of a moving violation which will jack up your insurance.

[BIg_ALEX]

Little OT, but a buddy of mine got caught doing 80km in a 70km zone. So he gets the ticket, was P'd off, and then on his way home (while venting) crumples up his ticket and throws it out of the window. LMAO.

[KingsFan25]

126 up in the fillmore area.

I've never driven the 126. I'm used to the 210 which is an absolutely speedway once you get past Foothill Blvd. Some days I've had to go at least 90 to keep up with traffic. Thankfully I haven't gotten a ticket in three years and I normally drive 80mph in a 65. Knock on wood.

[RAIDEN6]

I've never driven the 126. I'm used to the 210 which is an absolutely speedway once you get past Foothill Blvd. Some days I've had to go at least 90 to keep up with traffic. Thankfully I haven't gotten a ticket in three years and I normally drive 80mph in a 65. Knock on wood.The 126 is DEAD even during the day. I'm just nervous to tell my parents although I pay my own insurance bill and everything :o

[rimpila3]

I would expect them to pay any difference there may be in insurance costs. Other than that, it seems pretty minor, there's no need to take their license away.

[SlayKnotV1]

That's why insurance is so high in New York State! We can all thank your brother! :p

LOL This is why i don't Drive :D

[Philly 5-0]

Ehhh that's nothing to get upset about. The cop just felt like being an ass to you.
Yea cops are always asses:mad:

[sibelius]

Yea cops are always asses:mad:

Either that or they've had to answer too many calls where they cleaned up the dead bodies of 16 year old kids who thought they could drive 80 in a 65 zone, but couldn't.

I'm not busting his balls here, but he was speeding by 15 mph over the limit. He got caught. That's not the cop's fault. He needs to man up to it and take responsibility, not blame the cop.

[KingsFan25]

The 126 is DEAD even during the day. I'm just nervous to tell my parents although I pay my own insurance bill and everything :o

Just pay the ticket or do whatever and let your parents know. It happens just don't sit on it and end up paying more or getting a warrant out for not paying on time.

Hopefully they'd understand. Also don't ask them to pay it for you lol.

[RAIDEN6]

Either that or they've had to answer too many calls where they cleaned up the dead bodies of 16 year old kids who thought they could drive 80 in a 65 zone, but couldn't.

I'm not busting his balls here, but he was speeding by 15 mph over the limit. He got caught. That's not the cop's fault. He needs to man up to it and take responsibility, not blame the cop.Where did I blame the cop?

[sibelius]

Where did I blame the cop?

you didn't. I didn't say you were . . . someone else was badmouthing the cops and I was saying that line of reasoning wouldn't help you. I was responding to someone else's comments, not yours.

[biteyahard]

Dude. tell your parents, trust me. Yes they may be pissed but better now than later when they will be double pissed you hid it from them. ;)

Go to traffic school, you will not get points and they CANNOT raise your insurance by law. You will have to pay the fine and an extra $20-$30 for school but it will not cause any other issues.

[RAIDEN6]

Dude. tell your parents, trust me. Yes they may be pissed but better now than later when they will be double pissed you hid it from them. ;)

Go to traffic school, you will not get points and they CANNOT raise your insurance by law. You will have to pay the fine and an extra $20-$30 for school but it will not cause any other issues.I heard you can go to traffic school online, is that true?

[JerseyDevil]

I heard you can go to traffic school online, is that true?

Maybe only in certain states. Check your local DMV or their website.

[biteyahard]

I heard you can go to traffic school online, is that true?

yep just did it a few months ago, you have to actually be there thoght they come in and ask you live questions. you can't skip ahead, it's just like being in class but at least you can do it in your own room. :)

[RAIDEN6]

Maybe only in certain states. Check your local DMV or their website.Well one of the guys on the morning shows here in CA said that he took it online. I'd rather do it online.

[julio1867]

Guiding Children to Solve Their Own Problems
by Jim Fay

Love and Logic Step One:
Empathy.

* "How sad."
* "I bet that hurts."

Love and Logic Step Two:
Send the "Power Message."

* "What do you think you're going to do?"

Love and Logic Step Three:
Offer choices.

* "Would you like to hear what other kids have tried?"

At this point, offer a variety of choices that range from bad to good. It's usually best to start out with the poor choices.

Each time a choice is offered, go on to step four, forcing the youngster to state the consequence in his/her own words. This means that you will be going back and forth between Love and Logic steps three and four.

Love and Logic Step Four:
Have the child state the consequences.

* "And how will that work?"

Love and Logic Step Five:
Give permission for the child to either solve the problem or not solve the problem.

* "Good luck. I hope it works out."

Have no fear. If the child is fortunate enough to make a poor choice, he/she may have a double learning lesson.

©1979 Jim Fay
Permission granted for photocopy reproduction.
Please do not alter or modify contents.
For more information, call the Love and Logic Institute, Inc. at (800) 338-4065.

[sibelius]

I heard you can go to traffic school online, is that true?

I think you can - if I end up in that position where I have a ticket, I may try to do that myself.

Ooh, that's actually a really good idea! If you get that set up or even take it, THEN tell your folks . . . come at it from the angle of "yeah, I really screwed up and I know I blew it. I've already taken this class because of the insurance, but also because I probably needed the reminder about driving safety. I'm glad I took that class, I feel like I'm a better driver for it."

I know if my son did that with me I'd be a lot more accepting of the ticket. I'd like the fact that he was responsible enough to take corrective measures himself, without me telling to. I'd wonder if it was genuine or if it was BS, but I'd probably give him the benefit of the doubt. LOL

[petenfld]

Did the cop ever lose sight of you - that is reasonable doubt even if there is no other vehicles
I can't say I would make too much out of it.
I have had a few tickets in the past
I would only make them pay for it and any increase in insurance costs that comes with it
I find that a lot of tickets I got were areas where the limit drops unneccessarily and they get you in a trap
It's the highway speeds that I would be concerned with where people are going 130 or more km/hr in a 100 zone

[Spawnomite]

have you ever heard of caning? :rolleyes:

[ruggerx]

Well one of the guys on the morning shows here in CA said that he took it online. I'd rather do it online.

Yep, you can do it online here- my wife just did it (she was speeding, too, but I don't think she told her parents). I got snagged for making an illegal left turn in Malibu (one of those "Not between 7AM and 9AM" deals)- ironically, because I was taking my wife's parents to LAX (okay, I'll drop the parents stuff now). I wish I'd have taken the driver ed course, because when I got motorcycle insurance a few months later, they tacked on $120 a year because of it (for 3 years, I hear).

I've ridden the 126, and 85 is fast there. I see cops there all the time- it must be the big money-maker up there. The 405, the 101, even the 118, 85's not that big a deal, but people are going to notice on the 126. The 126 goes THROUGH Fillmore, with stores, traffic lights, and the occasional pedestrian- slow down.

Tell your parents what you did- everyone speeds, especially in SoCal- and accept the consequences. Tell them you're going to take the driver class and pay for it.

[Msteg45]

that's the thing. If your parents do nothing after the first ticket, you probably will have a second and a third . . . if you screwed up, you need to pay the costs for that screwup. When it starts coming out of your pocket, that's when you'll learn to follow the laws.

I got a ticket, my parents didn't do anything. I haven't had another. Just depends on the kid.

[CJenks]

When i got my first ticket (37 in a 25 :o ) my parents didnt care b/c judge didnt give me the ticket if i took driver improvement...

Second time they were pissed (77 in a 65 on interstate 95)... b/c everyones going that fast... but took it to court and got it reduced to a "equipment malfunction"...

So ive been pretty lucky when it comes to tickets so far... but parents got a little mad, but didnt get punished for either....

[Patriots2421]

80 in a 65 zone at midnight with no one else on the highway...(besides the cop lol)

I would ask them this: Were you going faster and the cop lowered it on the ticket? Cause they always do that. Then check with the cop to find the truth. If the kid was going even faster and lied, major punishment. If that's it, then preach a lesson and let it go. We all go about 10 over when no one is around.

[sibelius]

I got a ticket, my parents didn't do anything. I haven't had another. Just depends on the kid.

I did qualify my comment with "probably" . . . I think in general it's fair to say that when people pay the consequences for their actions, they're more likely to change their behavior. Don't you?

[caesar2002]

Taze him/her, then they will learn.

If that's the only thing that happens...then so be it...this coming from a guy who used to get 1 or 2 a year...well used to anyways, now I don't speed.

[porculator]

If it were me and I paid my own insurance, I wouldn't tell them about it. Take care of the problem yourself, pay the ticket, take the online drivers school, and no harm no foul. Except maybe that whole "trust" thing if they were to ever find out.

[BurningSoul]

I did qualify my comment with "probably" . . . I think in general it's fair to say that when people pay the consequences for their actions, they're more likely to change their behavior. Don't you?

If it were a seatbelt ticket we were talking about then yeah, their behavior might change and they will wear the seatbelt. But speeding to me is more of a habit and is alot harder to adjust. Sometimes I look down at my speedometer and don't even realize I'm going that fast.

[jumpman1144]

I only have 8 more years and then I can let you know how I would react as a parent. If my daughter has her own job and pays her own insurance and she tells me I will react the same way as I do here on the board here are your choices good luck let me know if I can help you. If I am paying her insurance and it happens we go to the local bike shop I buy her a mountain bike and she will ride a bike to and from school. until she can earn enough money to pay me back the money I have to shell out for her mistake. She learns a leason, hopefully she wont do it again and it is not that big of a deal but the punishment will be until she pays the ticket off. If she can mow 5 yards in one weekend and pay me back no big deal she has the car taken away for one weekend if it takes her 3 months she has the car taken away for three months but she would have learned a lesson either way. You sound like a good kid and I would bet you will tell your parents and they will help you figure out the best way so you don't get screwed. Best of luck with every thing and just watch out next time. I think you have 3 years and it is completely removed but each state is different.

[sibelius]

If it were a seatbelt ticket we were talking about then yeah, their behavior might change and they will wear the seatbelt. But speeding to me is more of a habit and is alot harder to adjust. Sometimes I look down at my speedometer and don't even realize I'm going that fast.

But habits are learned behaviors, right? And if we're talking about a young driver, 16 years old, that's the best time to respond to the ticket. Before they've had a chance to really develop that bad habit and make it their norm.

I guess I'm just not understanding your point. Speeding is a habit so parents shouldn't implement corrective actions when a child is given a ticket for doing it? I just can't buy off on that one.

[Jimmysru]

well how old is the kid i was 26 when i got my first ticket my mom and dad were upset but i had my own house and own family I still think my mom wanted to GROUND ME but if he lives in your house that is now your car and he shouldnt use it for awhile he should pay the fine and should now definetly be punished come on midnight no one else on the highway is a horrible excuse i am sure there was a guard rail and many other things dont be a COOL parent with this.

[Goalkeeper]

Big deal.

We all make mistakes.

You pay your own insurance and that will be punishment enough.

Admit what you did, don't lie, take responsibility for your actions and everything will be just fine.

[BIg_ALEX]

funny how after reading this thread I got a parking ticket today :p lol

[Noleman]

Pay the ticket, take the online class, then expalin to your parents what happened and that you have taken care of it. Since it is no money out of their pocket they shouldnt be too mad. Especially if they also speed.

[Sbells]

I only have 8 more years and then I can let you know how I would react as a parent. If my daughter has her own job and pays her own insurance and she tells me I will react the same way as I do here on the board here are your choices good luck let me know if I can help you. If I am paying her insurance and it happens we go to the local bike shop I buy her a mountain bike and she will ride a bike to and from school. until she can earn enough money to pay me back the money I have to shell out for her mistake. She learns a leason, hopefully she wont do it again and it is not that big of a deal but the punishment will be until she pays the ticket off. If she can mow 5 yards in one weekend and pay me back no big deal she has the car taken away for one weekend if it takes her 3 months she has the car taken away for three months but she would have learned a lesson either way. You sound like a good kid and I would bet you will tell your parents and they will help you figure out the best way so you don't get screwed. Best of luck with every thing and just watch out next time. I think you have 3 years and it is completely removed but each state is different.

What about the $ for the new bike?

[Zombie Spawn]

Yank the keys and let him/her walk for a while.

[Torffman]

I would be impressed. My son is only 18 months.

[RAIDEN6]

Yep, you can do it online here- my wife just did it (she was speeding, too, but I don't think she told her parents). I got snagged for making an illegal left turn in Malibu (one of those "Not between 7AM and 9AM" deals)- ironically, because I was taking my wife's parents to LAX (okay, I'll drop the parents stuff now). I wish I'd have taken the driver ed course, because when I got motorcycle insurance a few months later, they tacked on $120 a year because of it (for 3 years, I hear).

I've ridden the 126, and 85 is fast there. I see cops there all the time- it must be the big money-maker up there. The 405, the 101, even the 118, 85's not that big a deal, but people are going to notice on the 126. The 126 goes THROUGH Fillmore, with stores, traffic lights, and the occasional pedestrian- slow down.

Tell your parents what you did- everyone speeds, especially in SoCal- and accept the consequences. Tell them you're going to take the driver class and pay for it.80 mph, not 85 :P. And it wasn't through fillmore. It was at the part before the 5 freeway where there is nothing except road.

[exanimate]

Go to court and ask for leniency. The judge may drop it all together and give you a warning. What is the worst that could happen? You pay the ticket and move on.

[ahwkdrvr]

Yank his insurance and driver's license and let him walk for awhile, and he sure as hell would be paying the ticket and any increase in my insurance premium.

Exactly or instead of walking make him take the bus!

[Creation88]

ugh! do traffic school ASAP! do not wait til the last minute. you can do it online but it sucks and takes forever. good luck.

pay the fine/cost yourself and your parents should be ok with it. just tell them you got a ticket don't tell them the details unless they ask for it.

[Point65]

I would be impressed. My son is only 18 months.

That's the one I've been waiting to see.:D My kids aren't old enough yet, also.

Every day I go 78-79 on the 70MPH interstate all the way to school, here in Louisiana. I just simply get out of the way of the cops when I see them speeding up behind me. For some reason (I don't know what it is, but I was told this by a Texas judge) they won't pull you over unless you're doing at least 10 over the limit. I haven't been pulled over since then (July 1989, caught speeding, doing 72 in a then 55, going to Dallas and returning from Dallas on the same weekend, through Decatur on 287). Sometimes I think about going faster, but I pretty well adjusted to it.